The dirt was discovered missing in a routine audit of the town’s digging records. “We keep a careful record of what we take out, and where we put it back,” says the municipal Dirt Auditor. “Dirt is, after all, the foundation of this town, everything is built on it.”
It appears dirt was skimmed from several projects, as there are several types contained in the pile on Norma road. The dirt thief appears to have been accumulating the supply, waiting for it to get large enough to sell on the Black Market.
Neighborhood residents were suspicious, but figured there was something really stinky under the pile and decided it was best not to make a fuss.
The pile has become a public art installation known as Mt. Glen-Norma and has served the neighborhood as a traffic calming device. The monument grew over time, after initial mentions on social media several weeks ago.
Spray paint on the street at the base of Mt. Glen Norma notes, “Best Neighborhood in Bedford.” The exhibit includes floral tributes, references to WWII monuments, and figurines. A banner celebrates the micro-car that reached the summit of the 3.25-foot peak.
Now that the mystery is solved, a remedy needs to be found. The Dirt Auditor has a meeting scheduled with the Hole Coordinator to see if there might be a way they can work together.
Mt. Glen-Norma may well be removed early during the week of October 7.
Editor’s Note: The Scallion is a lighthearted attempt to poke gentle fun at ourselves. It’s satire and not to be taken seriously!
Tourist in Our Town ~ Mt. Glen-Norma
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